Jeff Gordon 
announced today that he was firing  his entire pit crew.This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take  advantage of President Obama's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters.  The decision  to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths  from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without  proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds  with thousands of dollars’ worth of high tech equipment.   
It was thought to be an  excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team, as many races are won or  lost in the pits.
However, Gordon got  more than he bargained for.  At the crew's first practice session, not only was  the inexperienced crew able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but  within 9 seconds they had changed the paint scheme, altered the VIN number, and  sold the car to Dale Earnhardt Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, and some  photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower.

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